light (1991)

nearsighted
speak the language
oceanfront
light
the angel in me
hardship
love rennaissance
my itch
death, by retail
shine
brassman
hold me

nearsighted
she sits alone
staring at the empty canvass
the pressure to commit
is second only to the feeling after

and how she cannot judge
is her painting worth it's weight in paper?
who could convince
her of the power and the beauty of her gift?

she stares at it for ever
'til the scene becomes a mirror
and she sees her own reflection
nearsighted

she recalls the day
recollects the inspiration
how it made her feel
and how her hands allowed her heart to lead the way

but once her work is done
her heart can never be invited
to the unveiling of
that extension of herself that she cannot see
her heart won't let her see

so she stares at it forever…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

speak the language
helpless has never been
one of my favorite colors
but it describes the feeling here
i hear the natives speak
their words go by so quickly
and i can't even say sincere

and my heart cries
as i listen to sounds so sweet
i'm fascinated
by a language
that i don't speak

if music is my trade
and my instrument my tool
these songs must surely be my home
but when i listen to my hero
i sit outside her mansion
it's so warm inside
out here it's so cold

and my heart cries…

i long to speak
your language

communication seems to be
the truest act of wisdom
i pray i have something to say
someday

but now my heart cries…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

oceanfront
well alright - now that i'm out of her life
the coast is clear
anything
man i can do anything now
without her here

in this desert
build castles in the sand
or start a one man band

oh the night breeze shoots a chill of relief
so cool - long - free
solitude
yeah - that's the ticket
solitude
just the stars and me

and the empty space
with plenty of room to dance
or read a harlequin romance
constellate the stars
or practice a little jazz guitar

we were oceanfront
sun, sand and sea
but now i'm a prisoner of
two out of three
what's the difference between
a barren stretch
and a coral reef

well alright - now that i'm out of her life
the coast is clear
anything
man i can do anything now
without her here

in this desert
do cartwheels 'til the dawn
run the marathon
build a gambling casin
invent some new machine

we were oceanfront…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

light
ocean-future-waters so deep
buried treasure guarded by thieves
their love for the water
has taught me their secrets
and somewhere in their truths lives a lie

i'm deep in the water
frightened by blackness
but somewhere in that darkness is light
somewhere in that darkness

greed-pollution kills all that's free
art for money is oil to the sea
their buying and selling
has gained them great riches
but somewhere in that heaven is hell

i'm deep in the water…

and i call it hope

electric dolphins dance in the sea
no gold could buy the air that they breathe
their love for the water is all that propels them
there's something about that dream worth a try

i'm deep in the water…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

the angel in me
the angel in me
wants to lend you her hand
while the devil in me
wants to bite that angel's hand
the devil in me
has just one life to live
while the angel in me
has just one life to give
to others

i'm at war with myself
in the deepest part of the soul
the battle rages
witness the hardened armies of my selfish side
fighting on to ignore
cries from the compassionate me<> compassion

the angel in me…

and with every day i chase the sun
opportunity whispers - damn her forked tongue
what if Jesus Christ had denied his role?
is there a compromise in this life
that would bring peace to my soul?

please bring me peace

the angel in me…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

hardship
this is a hardship
it's time to test the sailor
to see what he is made of
is he strong inside?
this is a hardship
a journey for the seafarer
a challenging adventure
he must meet head on

and i'm not sending out an s.o.s.
i'm not waiting here for someone's help

this is a hardship
and i must
sail alone

who built this hardship
who killed the trees to make it
sent them to the sawmill -
the shipbuilders yard?
why i built this hardship!
and set her in the water
i gave her a name and painted it
on her stern

and i'm not sorry now for what i've done
i'm not putting blame on anyone

this is a hardship
and i must
sail alone

anywhere a doubt can go my hopes can follow
anywhere a lie can go the truth can follow
i will be the one to sail it around the world
i will bring it home - i will bring it home

this is a hardship
it's time to test the sailor
to see what he is made of
is he strong inside?
this is a hardship
and i must -
sail alone

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

love rennaissance
we're finally out of the dark ages
shed the servant's servile gloom
we're bidding farewell to doubts and fears and helpless, hopeless feelings
credit faith for our rescue

clouds now breaking up reveal a sun whose love has always been
castle walls torn down no longer dampen sounds within ourselves
let the music play for joy that this is our love renaissance

so the feudal plight is over
and these are nervous thoughts unchained
excited by the potential of an empty canvass
inspired by hope again

fields that we once toiled with malice now these hands work ardently
narrow minds once deaf to color feel the warmth of our landscape
let our paintings prove out passion this is our love renaissance
this is our love, this is our love, this is our love renaissance

love renaissance

we're finally out of the dark ages
i feel the love's light shining through
we're bidding farewell to doubts and fears and helpless, hopeless feelings
credit faith…

clouds now breaking up…
castles walls torn down…
let the music play for joy…
let our paintings prove our passion…
this is our love renaissance

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

my itch
is this a throw back to my youth
when i could not afford
not that i can now - but look ma
i've got a mastercard
same place at a different time
underneath an old wooden sign
it says "baseball cards"
and so i run in

but i'm not getting younger
and i'm not getting rich
and the day will soon come when i must control
my itch

i'll trade you pete rose for your johnny bench
i love to say i can remember when
it was '75
it was dad and i
just a cardboard photograph
with hits, strikeouts and times at bat
and how many homeruns
how we love homeruns

but i'm not getting younger…

at 25 years old
i'm one-third down the road
and i feel so out of prime
cincinnatti just one more time
make me feel that young again
when our heroes win - we win
and forget

how we're not getting younger…

© 1991 bonnie jean songs

death, by retail
this jaded progression
it so empty and hollow
raped by those who knew it only
as a trend they should follow

but it's an excellent frame for this picture
a still life of japanese answers
to american questions of purpose
it was shot with a nikon of course

death by retail
the cost of living is killing me
death by retail
death by retail

so i'm up to my eyebrows in payments
my third visa is long overdue
mean letters fill up my mailbox
my student-loan has got to come through
if the Lord is my shepherd
what more could i really need
but a wireless phone with touch-tone service
and an answering machine

death by retail
the cost of living is killing me
death by retail
my shopping spirit has all but left me
death by retail
death by retail

i've got to learn to live within
i've got to learn to live without
i'm gonna learn to live within
i'm gonna learn to live without

if the Lord is my shepherd
what more could i really need
but a vcr with remote control
that works with my t.v.

death by retail

© 1992 bonnie jean songs

shine
separated – by doubts and fears
kept together – by all the same doubts and fears
so who’ll be the one to break down first
who’ll be the devil on this hell on earth?

‘cause this love just don’t shine anymore
like it used to shine anymore
it just don’t shine

responding – but never talking first
reacting – my fingers crossed that the cloud will soon burst
this gray ugly sky depicts our pain
we won’t see the sun until we pray for rain
until we pray

‘cause this love just don’t shine anymore...

separated – by doubts and fears
kept together – by all the same doubts and fears
so who’ll be the one to break down first
who’ll be the devil in this hell on earth
hell on earth

‘cause this love just don’t shine anymore...

© 2006 bonnie jean songs

brassman
slow down
come go down
to a place on dresden blvd.
in a home there
lives a wealthy man
he owns a million shares of love that he inherited

and just like his mother's house
countless knick-knacks line his walls
his brass collection stands out tall

he's got a tiny sail boat - a matching spoon
pair of large mouth bass - a big elephant too
in a house-sized collection that will never be sold
i call him the brass man
though his heart's made of gold

on a good day while he earns his pay
buying old tools he'll repair and sell again
at the pawn shops where he makes his stops
he'll spot an item he's been looking for - a gift for a friend

and just like his mother's house
as warm as could be
his door's wide open for those in need

they see his tiny sail boat…

just like his mothers house…

come see his tiny sail boat…

© 1992 bonnie jean songs

hold me
a hard rain has fallen
and now i'm soakin' wet
and i'd reach for your comfort
but you're already there

so much thunder and lightnin'
there could be no worse storms
and all i really feel like doing now
is cryin' in your arms - so

just hold me and never let me go
hold me and never let me go

i'll need to study the damage
make time for repairs
maybe even gather a few tools up yeah
but right now i don't care - no

just hold me…

tomorrow holds promise
i believe in each new day
but girl if i should stumble
don't get out of my way - no

just hold me…

© 1993 bonnie jean songs